Is this what we have to look forward to?
It’s 2008, and it seems like marriage is on the decline. Take a look at Hollywood where the divorce rate is between 67 and 70 percent… there are too many people breaking up, and not enough people making up.
Generally, I think the institution of marriage is failing in the midst of this divorce revolution. But, according to statistics, our national divorce rate per capita has gone down to its lowest rate since 1970. The most troubling statistic, though, is that the divorce rate broken down by age and gender is the highest for men ages 20 to 24 (38.8%). They are closely trailed by women ages 20 to 24 at 36.6%. This statistic pretty much encompasses everyone in my journalism course (excluding Seth, our prof). What does this mean for my generation?
More young people are choosing to cohabitate rather than tie the knot. Now in the generation my mom grew up in, the idea of living with someone of the opposite sex who you are not married to was seen as a little scandalous. To this day, my parents would probably balk at the idea of me living with a boyfriend. But, millennials actually view cohabitation as a legitimate alternative to marriage. Katie Anderson, a 20 year old female, said that “marriage is a smart decision economically, but who knows if I will ever tie the knot. After I get my degree, I won’t need a man to support me like my mom did since she didn’t go to college.” Also, the high rate of divorce is discouraging. Who wants to get married, fight all the time, and then lose half of your stuff after the whole thing is over?
Despite all of these statistics and popular sentiment, marriage seems to remain on the agendas of many 20-24 year old Americans (including one of the onefourfour writers, Laura)! I can remember day dreaming about the dress and the cake and even the groom when I was a little girl. Honestly speaking, I still day dream about these things. There’s something endearing about the thought that my prince charming is out there, and we have the opportunity to make a life together with a car and a dog and a white picket fence (Sadly, only heterosexuals have this right in most areas of the Nation). I want to get married. I want to have kids. I do not want to get divorced. But, we’ll see…
What about you? Where do you see yourself in 10-15 years?
144 Things to Do...According to the Millennials 
Good point, Bri. The idea(s) of marriage and divorce have sure changed since our parents were kids. It is now almost accepted to have children outside of wedlock rather than suffer through a loveless marriage. It brings up interesting arguments about family and the atmosphere in which your children are raised. I am no expert, but coming from parents who are still married and who were married for six years before having kids, I credit them for the fact that I am relatively well-adjusted and happy in life. I have no excuse not to be optimistic about my own future. I have faith that I will have a successful marriage too. But if not, it is comforting to live in a world where, as a woman, I know I will be able to provide for myself without depending on a man to do anything for me.
I hate the frequency of divorces today – no matter how common it is it still tears apart a family and hurts the kids. I have been so blessed with parents who have been married for 30 years and they have promised us (my sister, brother and me) that they will never get divorced. They have gone through really really hard times and the easier choice could have been to get divorced, but they rely on their faith in God to get them through those times. No one wants or expects to get divorced, but I do think too many couples give up too easy and make selfish decisions. No child wants to see their parents miserable in a marriage, but they also want to see their parents try as hard as they can to get through trials. It would be my worst nightmare to get divorced and I guess the only scenario I would imagine myself having to do so is if there was adultery involved (God forbid that doesn’t happen!). My sister just got married two weeks ago, which is so exciting and she has had the great example my parents have set in their lasting marriage. I definitely want to get married and have children! Now when that will happen I have no idea…
Bri, I really enjoyed reading your post. I have been dating my boyfriend for 5 years in December and we are planning to move in together in May, when I will be graduating. He has one year left at St. Edwards. Recently we have talked about marriage and have both decided that we want to wait for a year or so after his graduation (though I will admit to dreaming about getting shiny diamond for our anniversary this year!). I hope our waiting for a little while will increase our odds of making it and ensure we don’t make the wrong decision. I don’t want to be a part of the divorce statistic.
My parents have been together for about 34 years, and I’ve seen the up’s and down’s of marriage. They’ve described it as the hardest thing you’ll ever do, and I believe it. Through all of this, I still believe in it. I still think it’s worth it. Good luck to you and your boyfriend, Brittany, and congratulations to your parents Caroline and Kristin!